Weekend plans

BeachIt has been a very emotional past few days, for all three of us.  I have felt far away and helpless, as they struggle through a bit of a rough patch.  I have been just aching to hold both of them, and it has been really difficult for me to be so far away.  I thought about going down there a few days ago, but couldn’t make it work, and would probably have just been in the way.  I made them a sweet little movie to let them know that I love them both very much, and I will be down there with them tonight.

I have the wheels in my head turning and spinning and working overtime to try and come up with a few ways that Pam and I can make sure He gets His little love meter filled up.  I don’t want to pressure her.  She tends to retreat and shut down when she feels pressured.  I don’t want to require sexual activity of her.  I just want for her and I to both hold Him, touch Him, whisper in His ears.  I know how happy that would make Him.  And it will help with the rest of the weekend.

Pam and I are going to the beach tomorrow, and staying Saturday and Sunday.  This is our first overnight trip together, and I am a bit nervous.  I had become a bit neutral in my feelings toward her lately, and out of nowhere the past few days, she’s back in my head the way she was a few months ago.  I am by no means going to rush her or anything like that, but I am very much looking forward to spending some time that is just us girls.  I think it will be good for us.  And the beach is my home.  I grew up there, and I cry every time I see my first palm tree.  I feel safe and relaxed when there is salty air around me, and waves lapping at my feet.  I am excited to get to share that with Pam. 🙂

It will be good for Him, too.  He knows I will take care of her and bring her back to Him, and He knows that she will take care of me as well.  But before we go, I want to make sure that He has a few thoughts and memories to think about when He is going to bed.  I want to make sure He has yummy things and sweet things and happy things dancing through His head so that He doesn’t have a moment to miss us!

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